I’ve been noticing recently that more and more people are looking for the “perfect” person.
Their ideal partner is bourn from watching Hollywood movies or seeing catwalk models. For most of us this is never going to be our reality unless we are already moving in those
circles.
As a matchmaker I often have clients coming to me describing the physical traits that a partner must have, blonde hair, slim, tall, broad, blue eyes, no facial hair, full head of hair etc etc are all things I have been asked for.
Let's take a moment though - do all these things add up to someone being your perfect match? Absolutely not! These are all a wish list, like a shopping list; the roundest apple in the greengrocers may not be the tastiest. The same goes for choosing a partner - the best looking person in the room may not always be the person who matches you on values and core beliefs.
When looking for a partner it’s important to know what your values are so you can be true to yourself and look for someone who’s values align with yours. Attraction is so much more than the physical; personality plays a huge part. Intelligence & a passion for discovery, whether it’s a hobby, career, or cause—is often very attractive. Being around someone who is excited about life, eager to learn, and engage deeply with topics often ignites the same excitement in others.
Confidence is magnetic. People who are sure of themselves and their abilities tend to attract others too. This doesn’t mean they are arrogant, but they have a sense of self-assuredness, are comfortable in their own skin, and a have positive attitude toward life.
A good sense of humour often makes someone more attractive. Being able to laugh, especially together, can create a strong bond. Humour lightens the mood, reduces stress, and helps people feel more connected. We all know someone who says they were “laughed into bed” right?!
So, next time you find yourself judging someone on whether they have the right length hair, right shaped body, right coloured eyes or a wonky tooth, maybe refocus on who they are as a person, what their values and beliefs are and do their personality traits match yours. This is a far better place to start.
I wish you love
Cath x
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